At 11 weeks we told our parents because I was already showing. When I say 'we' I of course mean Lou. Because I have always found it incredibly difficult to mutter those infamous words "I'm pregnant" - even before all of our losses. Lou thinks it may harken back to me having to 'fess up to my mother at 17 years old that I had gone and got myself up the duff. Who knows? All I know is that I find it possibly the most awkward statement to make in the entire English language.
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I couldn't help myself, I explained to her about my high risk status. Mentioned the unmentionable words that have always come so easy to me, that my son died a few years ago and my pregnancies are always watched closely as a result. She was shocked to say the least. I enjoyed the shock infinitely more than the excitement (this is the HR that has been making my working life very difficult for the last few months, I wouldnt normally take delight in seeing someone squirm...)
Of course this means that in the next email newsletter sent out to the whole firm (sent out the next day) my little piece of news was included. Joy *twirls finger*. This, of course, means that all I've had all day is people coming up and gushing over how excited I must be. This, of course, makes me uncomfortable AND terrified again.
When it came to announcing to our friends, I chickened out and did the facebook thing by just posting an ultrasound photo.I did make sure that I sent a private message beforehand to each of my friends who I knew would be sensitive to the news, it was the least I could do after being knocked on my ass by so many pregnancy announcements myself.
It seemed like as soon as I did, there was a flurry of more announcements by my friends, some as early as 4 weeks! Honestly that just makes me cringe. I can't even imagine announcing it to the world at that point!
I know that there are some people who still don't know about the Bumblebee (lou's nickname for this newest baby). Luckily I am now at the point where they can tell 100% that I'm not just putting on weight, so I leave it up to them to comment! So this time round I've only had to officially say the words once.
How do you feel about pregnancy announcements? Are you excited and want to tell everyone straight away or are you like me and wish you could just announce the birth 9 months later??
i think it's such a personal thing. some people who have experienced losses say they tell early on so that they will have that support should anything happen to the pregnancy, good in theory IF you know you will get that support.
ReplyDeletei tell no one. Guv has requested that if we fall again that i don't tell him until later into the pregnancy - i can understand why, he's gone through our losses as well but it would mean i'd have to go through the early stages alone.
no matter how you tell or when you tell, the world that you're knocked up, there will always be someone you manage to piss off!
~x~
I couldn't say anything before 12 weeks. Was just too paranoid. Even after that I was scared!
ReplyDeleteI have never got past the 8 week mark, but I hope I can enter the second trimester this time around and announce (sensitively) on FB. I'm now barely 4 weeks, but we've told everyone that we love and are close to. The way my husband and I approach it, is that if we need to lean on these people in case of another loss, they have every right to know during the (anxious and semi-) celebratory phase too. Just my two cents.
ReplyDeleteSo much to say on this - I personally tell close friends pretty much as soon as I know but I reserve broader announcements until about 14 weeks - thought with my last pregnancy you could tell at about 8 weeks so it was a bit harder. With my first pregnancy I was 26 so happily waxed lyrical on Facebook. Next time I think I will be more cautious, more aware now of the struggles of others in this area and more sensitive to how they may find any news of this sort (I'm not preggers btw). In others news, I can only imagine your anxiety but I do wish you big congratulations xx
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