Today I find myself a little discontent but nowhere near the pain I felt a few days ago. Of course as we are now T minus 2 days I expect I could be back in that hole at any minute.This coupled with some seriously questionable political advertising of late, rubbing babyloss in my face, has led to just a small feeling of disquiet, and to a lesser extent, rage. On the upside it has led to many political conversations/arguments/debates (call them what you will) something I deeply enjoy. It has been nice to have something to channel my anger into. That and numerous fa.ce.bo.ok groups based around certain political parties have allowed me to vent much of my discontent to a wider audience.
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Tonight we will fill in the forms for our little man's gravestone. How bizarre. And how slack to have left it for two years. I feel equally disconnected from the whole experience and at the same time, like it is still too raw and that taking this step will finalise his death and it will be real. How odd.
I don't have anything particularly insightful or witty to post tonight...perhaps tomorrow will be a brighter day and will provide me with something else to blog about.
We are thinking of you over on the other side of the world. I love the picture you picked of your little man for the side here. Wish there was some way I could make all of this easier.
ReplyDeleteIt's ok to not be witty today or tomorrow, I'm sending you lots of huge ::hugs::
ReplyDelete*ICLW
Those posters shit me. Absolutely shit me. Waiting for an opportunity to rip at least one down. Many have been graffittied.
ReplyDeleteI think it's perfectly understandable to be sad when your baby's birthday is looming and he isn't here :(